its been awhile

neglecting this blog for months... so many things happening...

facebook gets into the way but there are no regrets.

anyway, will be posting more soon.

my review on Passengers

after watching the movie Passengers, i felt so depressed.

i searched the net about the movie and the ratings are as bad as it seems.

for me, i am not about to criticize. i just dont care about how they rate it. the thing here is about the acceptance of death.

the twist in the story did not satisfy much audience but for me, it seems so realistic. pardon if i do not know how to review a movie but here in Passengers, spoiler here... anne hathaway was dead all along. she did not know that she died in that plane crash and was among the passengers who died. the other characters were trying to help her out in another world. everyone in the scene was really DEAD all along. creepy.

the airplane crash scene is depressing as well.

the souls who do not accept death is still on earth. they still have their souls. they are still trying to look out to the light.

the missing persons in the story signifies that they already accepted death.

the foolish interview

after so many years of hibernation, i tried to fool myself into an interview i thought made me wake up from years of nothing-to-do and i am now paying the price.

you see, being a stay at home mom and applying for a job/work/school is the worst thing that you should not do! not only would you be humiliated for stepping into a situation like this but this is the most foolish move a mother would do.

they would have told me: hey mother! go to your house and be a mother. why bother applying for us? you have been hibernating for so long, stay where you are! you know nothing except to cook, clean!

that is what i felt.

the stay at home mothers have NO RIGHT to apply for anything. tell you frankly, WE HAVE NO RIGHTS WHATSOEVER.

so the next time people tell you to stay at home and be a mom, think twice. you are wasting your life. once a stay at home mom, you will be one forever. there will never be opportunities again for you.

rot will you? they will never accept mothers trying to work again.

or maybe i am too old. too long in the stagnant phase.

so for the second time, think twice when you are pursuing motherhood. not all understand the significant of motherhood, especially my interviewers.

i felt i should have sucked in myself at home and did not bother to go into some world of jobs because motherhood is a nonsense job for them. its a lazy job.... don't they have mothers?

anyway, think twice. motherhood won't feed you!!!

update:
since they did not call on me i assume that the application was rejected and i think so because after the interview, they did not tell me "see you" but the look of "thank you, go back to your house and rot there, will you?"

i will never forget their faces. the look of " hey mother, hibernation mother, go back to your house and mend your children. you have no right here! be a maid. die a scrapbooker!"

update:
of course my instinct was right all along. i was not accepted. oh well, maybe it was not meant for me after all.

i will die a mother and did i mention that i told them i was a designer while being a bum? i think they were laughing like hell! a fool like me trying to enter a very high tech course and just being a designer while being bum was the suckest form of doing and i think it was against my point.

some awards

these are some awards the kiddos got:

aedan -- bronze for 3rd honors ( nursery)
adriel -- most avid reader; diagnostic exam ( silver medal ); chinese writing contest ( 2nd placer)
andrew -- most outstanding member award; perfect attendance award both for scouting

adriel's excursion

adriel had his excursion at 8 waves, bulacan last february 28, 2009. it was a fun and exhausting day for the kindergarten pupils but they enjoyed very much!!!

andrew's piano recital

this morning, andrew had his first recital in piano. he played the merry widow waltz.

picture shown here is the finale song of the recitalists.

i was not able to take his picture while he was performing the piano... he was seated at the back, a bad bad position. but anyway, picture or no picture, he did great!

immigration medical exam procedure

ever heard of whirlwind medical examination for immigrant visa? well, i never heard of it either but wait till you hear what my parents have to say about it and other applicants for the canadian visa and particularly of course with a clinic off makati.

my parents were scheduled for their medical exam since upon receiving the embassy letter, they have to comply within 60 days. and so they booked their tickets and fly all the way from the province for this. my parents and yvette chose this clinic in makati since this was the closest and they have the only female physician who will take the physical examination.

that day, the clinic was full but the personnel were fast enough to accomodate the patients. it was their turn then. they had their xray, blood taken for HIV test and urinalysis.

papa - he has to go to a diabetologist for another check up. he has to have ecg.

mama - she has to see a cardiologist, have her ecg. she has murmur.

yvette - she has to come back for another urinalysis because of a physiological thing.

they paid 12t in toto.

after a day or two, they went to see their respective physician at a makati hospital.

papa - paid 9t for a series of blood exam.

mama - paid 7t for another series of blood exam too.

paid professional fee again.

mama was told to see a cardiologist and her eyes were checked. she has mild glaucoma, given medications and paid another 1200 for that.

after the results, they will go back to this makati clinic where they will be evaluated again and i dont know what the physician will have to say there.

when we googled this physician's name, her name popped out several times in different forums. there was a warning not to see this doctor. dont ever go to this one... she will refer you to this and that. she will make you go round and round and that's what happening to my parents.

we missed the warning and my parents are so stressed now with the procedures already not to mention their wailing wallet too! i understand that the embassy is very strict with these ( especially when you have lots of diseases) but there are lots of red tape here. my sister cannot go home to the province to attend school because she has to wait for the physiological thing to finish, she needs the urinalysis. she has to undergo the procedure at the clinic and only there.

arent they even considerate enough?

so the next time you embark on a certain procedure pertaining to anything, google it. search for it online. you will never know what you might find there. forewarnings you will never regret.

ouch!

my first time and the darnest thing!

i was fetching my kids from school at 4pm then. upon reaching school, the traffic was terrible -- i mean there was no parking whatsoever!!!! i spotted a place full of tricycle and pedicabs so i went there thinking that i would be able to park for a while. going in. changed to rear then i heard a thug!

ouch! i bumped the right side of the crv. a small dent but visible one was made by me! thats why those crazed tricycle drivers were not minding me at all, "deadma". it was because i got bumped myself. they don't the hell care!

geesh. i wont drive at 4pm anymore. i had never liked driving at 4pm . this was one of the rarest times and the darnest thing happened!

tulips for hearts day

got these beautiful and kinda dried up tulips for valentine's day.

playing with macro shots.

for more macro shots, you can visit my multiply account.

not so andrew

andrew caught with his fave paraphernalia-- the blanket of all times.

first macroshot

just so proud of my first shot using an extension tube and my new nikkor 50 mm f/1.8 lens. manual mode but i love it!!!

aedan's e.nopi bag

he is on his 2nd week now and is enjoying the worksheets given...

delifrance dinner with symbelly

last saturday, me and symbelly had our healthy dinner of sandwich and juice at delifrance- st. lukes branch.

wierd weather

in the last couple of days, the weather was thick and humid. but now, it is kind of cloudy and yet over the news online, the report read 32! oh well, last week, everyone was wearing sweater and what a sight to behold and to feel.

and now, we have to retain in our minds that summer might be coming and it is near.

how was my driving so far?

well, i know this is a boring subject for anyone to read but i would still want to rate myself: 4.5/10 stars.

aedan goes to e.nopi

next monday, aedan will start his e.nopi class level 1. very excited.

association of events

do you believe in the association of events? i am talking about the events that happened simultaneously -- in association with each other.

a friend giving birth as i am clicking the wrong data in an online transaction. sounds nonsense but the outcome of this birth is as surprisingly saddened as i clicked the wrong time for that certain online flight schedule.

it happened in a span of 15minutes. i think it was simultaneously.

well, if you don't get my point, i really do not know how to say it in words alright. but i believe that in some things, you and your friend think alike. you feel alike and certain things can make your path meet--- in a different world, that is.

leaves of life

when we were young, we were used to drinking barley green -- barley green powder mixed with water, at least for my papa who got this wonderful green from her brother in canada. and so we were given test drinks and for some time, this herbal drink made wonders. apparently, my uncle stopped sending barley to my papa and so without the availability here in our country, plans for future barleys were not in my father's agenda anymore.

until recently, i discovered, upon surfing the internet for alternative herbal medicines that i came about these 3 leaves of life. 3 in one-- the alfalfa, barley and wheatgrass which would help your body fight the unnecessary in life.

in caplets, you may take this 2 x a day. cost around 10 per caplet, that's only 20pesos a day or 560pesos a month for 3 greens which can hopefully maintain your body to its fullest.

my my my! i read that alfalfa causes weight gain!!! yaiks!!! i just have to finish the 10 caplets i bought and of course i have to stop taking this since weight gain is not for me...oh well.

a dead man's belongings

when my aunt lea passed away last december 23, 2008, the encounter with death seemed redundant again. my uncle who was close to the family passed away 48 days before and the grief was somehow still fresh.

when i went home to attend the funeral of aunt lea, i definitely had to see her room. in short, i am obliged to visit her room since she lived with our family for years. we treat her as the oldest member of our family next to my grandma. the day before the interment, her clothes were sorted out for disposal-- both in the burning process and some for donations.

after looking at her things, i realized that someday when a man has to leave the world, his belongings would cry out and beg " please bring me with you!". but can the dead hear them? when a person leaves, naturally and with a common sense, he leaves his things except for some worthy personal possessions which can go with the casket, and that was when i realized the essence of having so many materialistic things in the world. they meant useless.

when aunt lea left, she left so many stuffs in the world. who for? she cannot carry them all to her grave. a person will have to leave all. leave it on earth. all of them.

"sayang" - a word meaning waste. but i am not referring to aunt lea in particular. i am telling the world that when we die, we just have to leave these things--- things we loved, things we adored and are addicted to, our hobbies, our personal collections -- ALL TO THE WORLD! and in the end, they still do not belong to us.

so why are we loving the material aspect of our life when in fact in the end, we just have to leave them all along.

think.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21

driving to grocery

i drove myself for the first time alone at night. well, just to sm grocery. near. not an issue for anyone. churned...

at abalone restaurant, zamboanga city

for more than 20 years, abalone restaurant had served the public and is continuing to serve the palate of fine dining in zamboanga city...

here you go:

the sea mantis or "kamon" in the native chavacano dialect is a very delicious and sweet seafood delicacy. tastes like lobster but there is this distinct taste of sweetness in it. fried or steam, i prefer fried. great even without garlic vinegar dip. the claws are quite ferociously sharp, so beware.


the abalone. the ultimate experience in seafood dining... this unishell meaty animal taste like clam in its own unique taste. its meat cooked with perfection only abalone resto can give you... we have tried other resto serving abalone but to date, only abalone resto offers the best bite. here, it is cooked in with brown sauce.


the rock lobster is i think a specie of the big lobster we eat... only smaller in size and bit dry in texture, this "rock-y" sibling is a must for exotic food lovers! cut in half, you can pull out the meat without having to shell out bits of soft shells. a convenient satisfaction. goes well with the vinegar-garlic combo dip.


one of my faves. sharksfin soup with shitake mushroom. a little drop of black chinese vinegar will give your satiety a thumbs up!

all time favorite, the locon ( prawn ). fried and yet succulent to the tastebud.

new year 2009

happy new year to all, we welcome 2009 with hope, blessings and happiness!!!

a "turutot" or whatchamacallit trumpet for the new year. this is made of recycled materials.. of course i did not made this! hahahhaha.

we went to batangas to celebrate the new year's day. i happened to spot a walking insect on a red leaf on this cloudy afternoon.

i just love the color of poinsettias !!! no photoshop here. just plain and natural in its own way.

simple noche buena feast

baked chicken from my sis in law. sphagetti from the tricycle driver.


pizza hut.


baked chicken.


seafood stew by me.

living room with the tree

umbrella painting awardee

adriel was very lucky to win the umbrella painting contest courtesy of his mom. hahahaha.

boys shots during their field day

i used the extreme photo mode... alternating with manual mode.

some shots on way to cuenca

at the petron station, calabarzon highway...



trying hard to be a macro-sist. hahahahah.

some newbie shots...

forgive me.... i focused iyna on the first pic... i was trying to get her face focused rather than the hand. hihihih.



used flash here. an indoor shot with the notebook as my subject. trying to be macro.


a candid shot of adriel... see his expression.


i tried to focus on the van while it was moving at a speed. i also shorted my shutter speed. hihihi again.


no flash. i tried using flash but the effect was worst. oh well.

a funny story to tell

how i got my dslr as a gift will mesmerize you. it did for me.

how do i start, by the way? i bet it was my birthday and i was feeling a bit wierd. my sony camera was damaged and i was just borrowing iyna's cam which i am not used to and so, some of my shots were not that great but tolerable.

i did not order cake because i knew ro would be coming home early morning which he does every thursday.

it was my birthday---this thursday and i was not expecting him to come home and so i just ordered pizza for us and it became our cake as well.

i busied myself by doing altered slides for my friends since we would meeting the next day. i tried to distract myself thinking that this may be the saddest day of my life. somehow, nita ( my scrapbook friend) seemed to call me the past few days asking me if there was anything new... i was wondering why in the world she would be asking this to me. i told her nothing new, what is new to tell?

at 8:oo pm, i texted ro asking him if he was in conivance with nita. something i dont know perhaps? he replied back telling me he was toxic and he doesnt know anything. i told myself hmmmp, this is really going to be a pissed off day for me.

after few minutes, i heard the car horn. what!!!!??? ro is here already and he just texted me that he was busy and toxic! what is the matter???

he came up and told aedan to hold the "gift". he was telling him loudly so as to let me hear him." be careful, aedan!! it might break." i hurriedly went out and lo and behold, he handed me a dozen roses... somewhat surprising coz he never gave me flowers for my birthday and a small cake since we just had a pizzacake for me.

okay this is it. my birthday is about to end.

while we were eating he kept texting and texting. such wierdness. and he kept going to the window. i wonder why but i did not bother to ask nor minded him.

few minutes after those endless text messages, he hurdled me to the door. at first, instinct told me what the heck is he doing??? why was he pushing me to the door??then there was this man there holding a big sando bag with stuffs inside... !!! ro told me " get it and open it".

i saw boxes... 4 boxes.... my god. the nikon d60!!!!!!

i could not believe my damn eyes! i could not... he bought it. he bought it! my dear lord, he did not tell me... and all along, he was texting nita about why the delivery took so long to arrive!!!

nita called me up immediately and ro was laughing his way!! everyone knew about the surprise except me! they were holding the secret since tuesday!!!!! god!

i was so happy with the camera. it was a dream come true for someone who adores photography in a way. and it came with a 18-105 mm lens!!! not the kit lens!!!

it was the surprise of my life. more than anything. the emotion was draining and the transition was tremendous.

next day, we met up with nita and the gang. i bought my nikon with me too. as we were eating at shabu2x, au got hold of a strap and started telling me that if she was me, she would not use the nikon strap because the newer the strap, the higher the reselling price in the future. she also asked me if i would have any plan of buying a strap. i said no, not this time. au said, okay then this is yours.... ! what? i told her... are you giving this to me? she said yes and nita blended in giving me a tripod ( which she got from the car and poor me, i did not realize the notion why in the world would she be bringing something like that when in fact she did not bring her cam with her). i could not believe my mind and eyes... then sym handed me the remote control! what???? then mitch sy gave me the lenspen!!!! my god.. this is the jerry's essential kit III!!!!! and ro knew all about this again!!!!

the surprise emotion never left me the whole night... it was something i could not really comprehend. happiness, thankfulness, luck. but most of all, gratefulness perhaps for dear friends who makes you feel loved.

nothing is better than good friends sharing your special day with you. and even with the numerous greetings over the cyberworld and text message, it was so touching because people remember you and thats what important.

the might-be-saddest-day turned out to be the opposite one instead. it turned out to be one hell of a beautiful day for me...!!!

first shots! yay!

i still have lots to learn my god. indoor photography really is a challenge...

routine driving

these are my routine driving schedules:

sunday - 8:00am and 9:30 am
monday - 8:00 am 11: 00 am 4:00 pm
wednesday - 8:00 am and 11: 00 am

i do not drive tuesday, thursday, friday and saturday. i wished i would in those days.

andrew's 10th birthday

'twas andrew's birthday last september 26...

rebonding

after 2 years, it was time for me to rebond again for the sake of my "kangkang" hair. and so i added some hair manicure.. in short. i colored it too with cyclamen or another term for Red. lol

rant about my printer

it has been 6 months since i have to change my inks on my R290 printer and i have been a good girl. and now, after 6 months, these inks are labeled " hard to find" already!!!!! whatta...!!!

claria inks are new. they are expensive but they are of good quality. so how come these epson dealers do not carry them on their stores.. all i could see are Hps, canons and lots of other epsons EXCEPT the claria inks!!!!!

darn... we scouted the whole of Gilmore IT center only to find one store carrying it and still, i could not get a complete set! i still need Light Cyan so that my printer would work and now i need to print something! tell me this is not a bad news!

and so i have to scout for stores carrying the Claria wonderful "hard to find" ink!!!!! you know, 6 months ago i was hesitant to buy this r290 because i was so afraid of the claria ink which i think would really be hard to find and true enough, i am having a hard time now! they said this would be the top of the line and would be available easily and see me now... like a panting dog trying to look for its bone.

the next time you buy something, dont ask them anymore. trust your instinct.

tarot update

the time is near. i will have to read more and absorb the tarot book and cards before i finally have the guts to read... well, as i have mentioned, tarot is a guide. it serves as an opener for situations that are hard to decide...the end will always be our own decision. this book is a great reference to beginners like me.. oh well, this is another challenge and change. i am not a fortune teller as i have said. i just wish to help people take things on their own hands if they can. if not, then desperation is not the answer.

driving update

i drove alone to school at 730am and 11am. it was a day of adrenaline making. imagine, masangkay and bambang was so overly narrow this 11am because the other lane was closed due to another excavation of Maynilad! grrrr! and so the cars have to move slowly and carefully. you know i am only a beginner and to move fast in an "enquentro" is quite a no-no for me. really, it was one hell of day!!!!

twas sunday

twas sunday and a driving day for me. 830am- 930am. yesterday drove the kids to school at 730am too.

thats all. i just have to keep practicing though.

the fool's journey

i have been so curious with the fool's journey that i managed to purchase a deck of tarot cards. my purpose was just to collect but it seemed that there is an opposing force which i have to heed. i want to learn tarot because i want to help. i want to guide and open my inner mind to the needs of other people's emotions. after all, tarot is not what you called occult or devilish as what others would say but these cards are tools to help us and guide us understand situations.

i still have not started the routine for beginners. i am just waiting for the right time. the time means silence and concentration. i am reading some online tutorials so that i may have insights about what these readings are for and what each card represents.

so far, i got a deck only.. not those Kits as you would see in shops. and it is tucked right now inside my cabinet. free from dust and other energies.

remember, i do not wish to be a fortune teller.

it has been 4 weeks

it has been 4 weeks since i have been driving the kiddos to sunday school and to school whenever i have the chance to drive the crv... and all alone.

sometimes i have the feeling of knowing the all knowing but sometimes there is this doubt whether i could fit or not. it really takes a lot of judgment and precision when driving and that i have to master.

yesterday

yesterday, monday, i drove the kids to school 3x of a hell. first and foremost, i hate those pedicabs and tricycles entering the wrong way. they always wanna go to one-ways! second, i hate those vehicles trying to honk you. third, i hate those big cars parking in the middle of the street and leaving other vehicles to maneuver their way pass them! and i hate those pedicabs in school because i cannot park coz they are there! and most especially those calesas and pedicabs so slow you wanna overtake them but you cannot coz you just cant get the right timing!poooooh!

this was alone of course. alone and alone.

i also drove the 3 kids to sm san lazaro because i have to buy something at nbs and so noontime, i have to drive again. so many people. so traffic. makes my head spin.